Piss 2020

Are you guys drinking enough water? I always try to make that my resolution but I can never get it to take. This year instead of aiming at the problem I'm aiming through it, and instead of writing "drink enough water you idiot" on an index card and taping that to my computer monitor, I just decided that it's "Piss 2020". It's really working out great so far. I'm drinking enough water, I'm in much less daily fog, and tasks are a little bit more achievable. I always suspected this would happen, this feeling, but still nothing happened at all, no change, until I decided: "Piss 2020".

I don't even know what it means concretely, it just sounds good. And now multiple times a day I think to myself "it's Piss 2020" and then I go to the sink and chug a pint of water. That's good marketing! Don't tell me this is actually unhealthful, anyone. That's unrelated to my goal. Which as I said I don't know what that is. Except that it's "Piss 2020".

Integrating a new good habit can be tough, honestly, and probably around now if not already, a lot of you are giving up on resolutions. I hear ya. I'm much better at Lent, which is finite. When Lent ends and you give in, and go back to eating BBQ potato chips or whatever, that's a triumph, not a failure. And also Lent doesn't have a personal betterment requiry-- you can give up something that's bad for you or something good for you, either way, as long as it's something you at least kind of like. Even though Lent is a religious thing, there's no moral direction, it's just like, a physical challenge. A secular abstention moment. New Year's resolutions are more like This Is How It's Gonna Be From Now On Me Good Forever. It's too heavy! I'm great at a weird rule but only if it's just for now-- for long term change I think I'm better suited to a conditional statement or cryptic visioneering. I need wiggle room.

One year a while back for her yearly motivational slogan one of my roommates chose "No Drama" and for unrelated reasons I chose "Embrace The Chaos". For a little while we were in a tug-of-war with our third roommate, each of us yelling our platitudes at her and stomping our feet, trying to get her to see our particular light. Of course she didn't choose either, but absolutely twizzled our rigid little minds by choosing for herself the motto: "Ride The Wave". I was dumbfounded! She really took a thesis and and antithesis and produced a synthesis! A textbook example!

I hope "Piss 2020" can be like that, a new vantage point. I was talking a lot last year about moving the model of personal artistic production away from catharsis and towards peristalsis. Does that make sense? I feel like cultural critics prioritize catharsis and massive works as the gold standard in art, even in DIY scenes, but it's not healthy. Every now and then a massive work strains the facility, an opera or something, that's to be expected, and yeah when you've got something big in there, you gotta blast it out somehow. But you can't optimize for clogging up like that, it's disgusting. You gotta keep things in motion, that's peristalsis. But then at the same time it's not nice to walk around wholly unrestricted, ruining couches and family gatherings. And besides, you need to build up a little pressure if you want to get any distance, that's simple physics. What I'm saying is that you need a middle way. Piss 2020.

Tetradyne Cola from Powr Mastrs #3 by CF

A good example of piss energy is Mozart, who didn't just write operas, symphonies, and sonatas, but also numerous dances, divertimentos, and other forms of light entertainment, plus quartets, quintets, pieces for solo piano, other forms of chamber music, masses, and other religious music. Also he didn't have Tourettes as previously postulated (I just looked this up), he just loved to swear! God bless!!!! I know I've said this before but remember in the movie "Amadeus" where F Murray Abraham calls Moz "The Creature"? That entire movie was made up, it's a movie. But it rules. "The Creature"... so sick. If I found out someone was calling me "the Creature" behind my back, God, that'd be honey in my cup.


news / events

All upcoming events are now going to be listed here: [upcoming events]. For now all I got is this one:

  • This Saturday (January 25th) is the first show of "Strawberry Band", which is me, Cory, MZ, and Uncontrollable Frank from Funeral Cone. We'll be playing with Funeral Cone, RONG, and Alpha Error (featuring Gus). Benefit for Students For A Free Tibet. Thank you Lois for making this cool merch, which will be available at the gig:

links / addendum

  • I know for a fact that I've been talking a lot about peristalsis this year because I recently collated my "topics discussed" notes from the first year of my artists residency program, "CTRI Innovations". There's more about the residency here: [link], the full notes are here: [link], and the collated "topics only" list is here: [link]. topics are shown in alphabetical order, duplicates intact. Applications for this residency are still open.


  • Some of my previous Lenten give-ups include: Processed Sugar, Dressing Like A Slob, The Snooze Button, Movies Made After 1965, Hyperbole, and Apologizing. Special thank you to my friends that waited out No Apologizing, which was... not without conflict.
  • In "Blessed Are The Sick", the second record from Floridian metallers Morbid Angel, guitarist / main guy Trey Azagthoth dedicates all past present and future music to Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart. I love that. Morbid Angel songs don't have solos per se, they have "lava"?? They call the solos "lava" in the band's operating system. Or maybe solos and lava are different things? Either way, "lava", that's incredible piss energy. Here's a YouTube link to the isolated lava from their 6th record "Formulas Fatal To The Flesh": [link]. Also: all Morbid Angel records are in alphabetical order????

    1989 Altars of Madness
    1991 Blessed Are the Sick
    1993 Covenant
    1995 Domination
    1996 Entangled in Chaos
    1998 Formulas Fatal to the Flesh
    2000 Gateways to Annihilation
    2003 Heretic
    2011 Illud Divinum Insanus
    2015 Juvenilia
    2017 Kingdoms Disdained

  • The Mozart I listen to the most is the P Conc 23, here's a dynamite version from Wilhelm Kempff: [link].

Wind / Jazz / Outer Space

painting: "the Oracle" by Tom Bubul

Heyyyyyyyyyyyyy guys hows it going how's everyone doing what's it like out there how are you. Juuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuust checking in with this, the first post (bad luck to point out that it's the first post) on the new version of the legacy website. I'm trying for a weekly blast on this, every Tuesday from now till ?, and just want to let you guys know, right here, in the first one, that the first one is going to be bad, but they will get somewhat better over time, that's my experience. Some of the ones in the future will also be bad tho, that's allowed.

This used to be the main creation space, this website, where I wrote nearly every day for long long stretches of time, with intervals of disuse, from the year 2000 to the year 2010. I hesitate to say that this is where I learned to write, because who learns to write? But this is where I started to really enjoy writing. And it was a forum that I used to talk about, wow, just about every aspect of my life! This new round of website writing is not going to be like that, just going to say that right off the bat in this, the first post. This first post is about announcing that the new way is less about being a diary and more about being a broadcast, or like a letter that you get and then throw away, or a magazine clipping you find somewhere. The initial plan for this was "email newsletter", which is something I'm still working out the details for, but anyway, that's the vibe.

In keeping with the tradition established by the first iteration of the website, I will continue to use this space to "try and wrap my head around it". Possibilities for post formats include but are not limited to essays, questions, reviews, a collection of screengrabs, reader mail, interviews, guest posts, or "just saying hey". These are all viable categories for "what is a post". Some of these posts might involve trying to make sense of past projects, or archiving past works in some format. It would be great if I could use this space to chip away at larger writing projects, maybe to collate them later in some format, but who knows.

Announcements of upcoming events, that's going to be a utility of this website.

Having a dollhouse that I tweak out endlessly with funny little rooms and lights that work and secret passages, I can't help but picture that as a huge part of my experience with this website.

The original span of writing on this website is offline, and I have collected it safely, and sometimes in the evening I look at it or grep through it, for personal satisfaction reasons. What a relief to have that stuff no longer online! I'm not really a "burn the manuscript" kind of person, but I can definitely understand the desire. Maybe I'll call some of that stuff back up at some point though? It's fun to look at. I told Dan Wars that I'd make him a 10 volume set of books, 2000-2010, of the original run, but then I started to do just that, and I realized something interesting: I do not want to do that. That said, if you have a request for a topic to be searched in that body of material I will entertain the request, which is to say I'll consider it. 🙂

I set up a guestbook, please check in and say hi! [link]

OK it's tough to get loose on this, the first one of the new way on the legacy website, and I'm trying hard not to introspect too hard, as I've found that to be a particularly swampy procrastination vector. Soooooo I'm just going to list some upcoming events and news items and click post, and drink some more coffee, and do other things. I'll be wigglier on the next wave. See you then, or if you're not reading this immediately, but much later, then just: Hi!


news / events

  • Back issues of Mothers News are now available via 2 different distros- [What Things Do] and [Domino Books]. Austin wrote a great blurb for the Domino listing, describing MN as "utopic" and "approachable", which is a blessing. To be honest, I wrote the blurb for the WTD listing, which is why I'm described as a "colossal dreamweaver". I usually have a hard time writing about myself in a sales way, this time I dove into it and rolled around.

    I did a quick search for "colossal dreamweaver" in advance of the post to see if that was already a coin in some cultural context. Image search was almost entirely close-ups of natural fiber high-pile carpet, with a light dusting of zaftig Hyborian battle angels. In re: the distro catalogs and the image search, it's nice to be in good company.

  • I'm playing a show with a new ensemble on January 25th, a Saturday, at the News Cafe in Pawtucket. The band is called "Strawberry Band" and we're playing in support of Alpha Error, RONG, and Funeral Cone. Gonna have a couple newish songs, or songs that are new to a rock band context. The show is $5, doors at 7 music at 8. If you want to get hyped for the gig I recommend watching the movie Linda Linda Linda. If you want to get hyped to watch this very enjoyable movie you can read all about it on [Flan's blog]. I think we're playing last. All the bands are good.
  • My artists residency program CTRI Innovations is still taking applicants, if you want to drink a cup of coffee with me and have a rambling talk that eventually gets to "so, what are you working on?", you can apply online [here].

Links